Decisions that Run Our Life
What is that decision that you made as a little kid and has been running your life to date?
This Halloween I dressed up after a very long time, as at work and Toastmasters I was encouraged to wear a costume. I took advantage of the “Willy Wonka – Chocolate Factory” theme of my Toastmasters club to dress as a 7-year-old.
My school picture wearing pigtails was my inspiration, so there I went… Pigtails with white ribbons, dress, stockings, tennis shoes and my blue backpack… I have to admit that I looked at myself in the mirror and I hesitated going out like that… but the kid in me took over and I was ready to play.
Something magical happens when we set up our day to play. I had a lot of fun. It started by picking up the Wonka bar with the magic ticket and winning a gift card to a restaurant. Then, as I was driving to work… I started to remember what I was doing and thinking at 7 years of age… nothing came to mind… until I started realizing the life I created for myself and felt pretty happy about it. I could have not imagined all I have created for myself.
As I walked through the hallways, people asked me: Who are you? With a smile I responded, myself at 7 years old, today I came to play!! It was great to exchange a smile and sometimes a chuckle….
The day went by and all of a sudden I remembered that at this age, something made me angry and I decided to stop talking. As I can be somewhat stubborn… that went on for a while. I remember my mom commenting, we’ve been 5 hours in the car traveling and you barely said a word… If you ask me today, what made me angry, I could not tell you… However, thinking back, that decision to stop talking has cost me becoming invisible and having to work extremely hard to gain my voice back.
I have worked for many years to come out of my shell, and today people find it hard to believe I was super shy and quiet. So I have come full circle and that makes me smile… as I remember the internal struggles of not knowing what to say, feeling clumsy and out of place when wanting to connect through a conversation…
Many of us are unaware of the decisions we made when we were kids. Those decisions run our life and the dynamics that can make us uncomfortable or lead to success and happiness.
What is that decision that you made as a little kid and has been running your life to date?